This is a MUST READ if you have dreadlocks or debating dreadlocks.

I received a call from a man (we'll call him Bob) in California that has dreadlocks that are 18 YEARS old. I mean honestly, that is nuts! He said he's frustrated because he has to wash his dreadlocks every day.

EVERYDAY?!?! is that what I have to look forward to? If so I need to rethink this journey! Not that I am opposed to washing that often...but the drying time HAS to be forever. I digress...

So I start questioning him as I do anyone that has dreadlocks. He then announces that for 18 years, he's used Dr. Bronners and Neutrogena.

Problem solved.

Why? Well, for one simple fact.


What exactly is superfat and WHY is it bad? Buckle your belts...

When companies / people make soap, sometimes they add extra oils so that you, the consumer, get a more moisture rich soap. The extra oils don't have the ability to mix with the lye and saponify. In theory, do your skin, should be ok. In fact if you have dry skin, it is pretty nice. But for dreadlocks? Not so good.

According to this is what they say about how to superfat the this way you can ask the correct questions when attempting to use something handmade.

"There are three ways to superfat your soap:

1. Use oils which have higher percentages of unsaponifiables. Oils such as Avocado oil and Shea Butter contain oils which will not combine with lye and will remain in your soap for a more nourishing bar.

2. Reduce the amount of lye in your soap (also called discounting the lye). This essentially raises the level of oil in your soap above that which is necessary to combine with the lye for saponification. The excess oil will not saponify and will be available in your soap for a more moisturizing bar. Most soapmakers superfat their soap by 5% automatically. Some superfat as high as 8%.

3. Add certain oils at trace. Adding more expensive and highly nutritious oils at trace, after most saponification has taken place, will results in these oils remaining in the soap. Add oils such as cocoa butter and wheatgerm at trace for dry skin bars. For each pound of soap, add about one tablespoon of warmed/melted oil.

Remember, too much oil in your soap could results in a bar that is too soft to use or in excess oil oozing out of your bar (not a pretty sight). Most recipes from books and on the web have already been superfatted at 5%."

Why isn't it so good? (gosh, my science teacher in highschool would be so proud of would my english teacher!) Well, for starters dreadlocks + oil = a hot mess. The oil traps the daily nonsense in the air and environment around us. Then when you wash with a superfatted soap you think you got it out, right? WRONG! All that garbage STAYS IN YOUR DREADLOCKS! Then, when your dreadlocks are dried and you palmroll (because lets face it...a good palmrolling session is pretty darn amazing) you compress all that junk left in your hair. If you don't get your dreadlocks dry in a short time, all that garbage will turn to mold or a murkey brownish discharge that will seep from your dreadlocks. This is EXACTLY what happened with Bob's dreadlocks.

How do you fix this? Well, you really cannot if you have been using these kinds of soaps for years. Once you get to this stage, you have basically ruined your dreadlocks. There ARE things you can do to help remove this mess but it will take more patience and some extra work.

I have suggested that Bob do a deep cleanse. Mix 1 tbsp of Baking Soda to 1 cup of hot water (typically i suggest warm water but let's be honest...there are 18 YEARS of stuff trapped in his dreadlocks! I also typically suggest 1 tsp but again, time to call out the big guns!) into a large bowl / plastic bin / sink....whatever. Then I instructed him to let his locs soak 15 min and then to change the water out and do it again. After 30 min of soaking, I instructed him to take a full cup of room temperature Bragg's Apple Cider Vinegar into a gallon pitcher and then fill the rest with warm water (or you can mix it in the same container you used for your bs wash) and soak 3-5 min. Next step, hop in the shower and RINSE RINSE RINSE RINSE well. For Bob, I suggested he do this 1-2 times week to help break as much of this gunk down as possible. I also told him about the Dread Soap by Dreadheadhq.

The other way you can do a deep cleanse is WITH the Dreadheadhq Dread Soap. Add 1/2 cup of Dread Soap to a bucket / bowl / tub of water and scrub. If your locs are not locked, I would suggest doing this with a stocking cap on to help the dreadies during their fragile state.) Then you rinse really well :)

It's been 6-8 weeks since I talked to Bob and I'm hoping no news is good news. Was hoping he would share what the water looked like to prove this point but he DID say he was way too embarassed.

What if your locs are younger and you have been using superfatted soaps short term? Good news! By doing the SAME rinse on yourself you should be able to stop the damage before it's a permanent issue.

Ok, so far, here is a list of soaps that DO say they superfat their soaps and if you have dreadlocks (or are on the fence as to getting them) you SHOULD stay clear away.

Dr. Bronners (all varieties)
Neutrogena (all varities)
Maylee's Garden Vegan Soaps (I haven't yet gotten a clear answer whether or not she does superfat but from the residue that is left from the soap, it makes this a not-so-good choice for locked hair.)
ANY shampoo that claims its moisture - rich or has moisturizer or moisturizing in the name (or in the description)

Other things to consider when looking for a good shampoo. I know, I know all the flavors smell wonderful! However, a smell left behind in hair is really just an oil and that will lead to residue and that will lead to rot. So, here is a VERY simple test to see if a soap leaves a residue.


I mean, it IS really simple.

Take the soap you would like to use in your dreadlocks and wash your hands with it. After you wash your hands, smell them. How do they smell? If you smell anything then that soap WILL leave residue. If there is no smell, how does your hand feel? A lot softer/smoother? Then its a 95% chance that soap is superfatted and you should run away.

What can you do with all the extra soaps? Give em to your friends that don't have dreadlocked hair :) I'm sure they would be glad to get some free soap / shampoo. Food pantries LOVE donations so you could check with them and explain why you are donating them. Some will accept the donation, some won't. Cannot find a local food pantry? Find a local United Methodist Church. They tend to have food pantries in them.

There are very VERY few shampoos that are actually residue free. Even if a bottle states that it IS, do your research.

If you are thinking I might be making this up, here is what it says at

"Soaps have been made for millennia. Aside from making fire and cooking food, "saponifying" oil and fat into soap is one of the oldest and simplest chemical reactions known to humankind. In fact, the first soaps were accidentally made by fat dripping into the ashes of cooking fires.
Soap is made by saponifying a fat or oil with an alkali. A fat or oil is a "triglyceride," which means that three fatty acids of various carbon lengths are attached to a glycerine backbone. The alkali is either sodium (for bars) or potassium (for liquids) hydroxide, made by running electricity through salt water."

and here is where they ADMIT to superfatting....

"Unlike most commercial soap-makers who distill the glycerin out of their soaps to sell separately, Dr. Bronner's retains it in their soaps for its superb moisturizing qualities.
We superfat our soaps with organic hemp and jojoba oils for a milder, smoother lather."


So now what? Well, the choice is yours. I suggest Dreadheadhq's Dread Soap as it truly IS residue free. It leaves no scent, has no color and is perfectly clear. It lathers well and rinses away very nicely. If you find your scalp is a bit itchy, use less shampoo per wash OR rinse in it cooler water.

The other thing you can do....I did this in the beginning of having dreadlocks. I added some of my bathsalts to the shampoo (a tsp) and then washed them that way. If you do use these bathsalts once a week, that will help keep your dreadlocks clean, healthy AND helps your skin too! (if interested,

My friend Violet ( puts Dreadheadhq shampoo and some baking soda into a spray bottle and that helps with the SLS sensitivity. (Violet, please post your recipe for others!)

I hope this blog will help you make smarter decisions on about the care of your dreadlocks. I do recommend washing 2-3 times a week and then doing a monthly deep cleanse just for an extra safe measure.

Until we dread again...
Peace, Love and Locs,

happy birthday

12/6/09 Day 1 with Dreadlocks

12/6/10 Day 356 with Dreadlocks

So it's been a FULL YEAR! I just am at a loss for words.

When I started on this journey, I had NO idea really what to expect except that I would have dreadlocks. Never expected to learn about patience, forgiveness, God's grace / love / humility, friendship, effects of negativity and did I yet mention patience? I have gained some powerful and amazing friends along this journey and to each of you (you know who you are) I am humbled to share this experience with you and looking forward to the next year!

If you would have told me 10 years ago (shoot even a year ago) that I would be making a living on doing dreadlock work and helping others on their journey, I probably would have laughed at ya. I mean, lets be honest. I would have never expected to travel as far as Ohio (to the west), Ct (to the east) and SC (to the south) all in the name of dreadlocks! I would have never expected to open a studio and a second location in Jacksonville, FL...and then a third in Denmark all within 6 months! Knotted By Knature, although still needing a website...i am just not creative enough to make booming and it feels great! I feel confident that the people that are working with me actually KNOW what they are doing and can help people with the correct information. It's just amazing. And knowing that I am able to help more people then just those that want maintenance or dreadlock work...I am able to have products from others in the dreadlock community for sale in the store front we will have in January in Jacksonville!

I've always been the girl that fits into most any clique as I get along with almost everyone. I don't care what you have or don't have...I care about your heart. And I think that is the right way to be. The ironic thing is...I feel like I have found a community that is as loving as my church community. Between my family at Christ Community UMC and the Dreadheadhq Community...the amount of love, respect and positiveness that come with them...I am just uber blessed. Words just cannot even begin to describe this. I pray that everyone reading this can find a place that just accepts them for themselves and unconditionally loves you.

Please, don't get me wrong, it's now all daisies and strawberries...there have been bumps and there will ALWAYS be bumps. You stand up, brush yourself off, thank the God the Creator for the chance to learn valuable lessons and walk forward onto your next adventure.

I feel this blog is going to be turning into more of what I am learning in doing all this dreadlock stuff than anything. I have taken some calls for Dreadheadhq that STILL are with me and I will need to blog about. This will include (with people's permission) pictures and such. I would be VERY interested in knowing (feel free to comment on this so I can keep it all in one place) why YOU got your dreadlocks and what YOU have learned. It doesn't have to be anything profound or whatver...sometimes the simplest things ARE the most profound.

So here is to another 365 days where we can all grow together in knowledge and wisdom and love. I will be making a more conscious effort to blog more often. I am sorry that I have slacked GREATLY in this area. I would like Tuesdays to be the day that I blog as it will be right after the live chats I host ( on Monday nights!

Here are some of the people I would like to particular order...and if I leave anyone out, I apologize from the depths of my soul!
My son Noah, Michelle McAlhaney, Dreadheadhq (Jonny and Sloan), John (H.) Dreadman - Kobb, Dustin Camper, Amy Schile (and Phoenix for all the kisses!), Jennifer Rose, Violet LeHew-Fletcher, Jason Robinson (and Aurora for being so darn cute!), Toni Rase, Mikkel Kirketerp, Kate Kamphausen, Luz Williams / Junglemama, Melisa Sword, Beth Laquay, Alyssa Beardsley, Beatlebaby Glassworks, Preach Freedom and the countless others that have given support and encouragement. I really wouldn't be here without you!

Peace, Love and Locs,
Betseh the Crazy Salt Lady!



thanks for checking in again. so these last few weeks have been a little...crazy.

i found an opportunity to challenge the biggest wax hater and i won the challenge. even after winning the challenge, he still has continued to provide me with hate mail....and not just from him!

so i digress...i feel maybe showing the positive will negate all the negativity that he shows. so here goes!

as a previous blog states, i started my locks more like the knotty boy way. i had no idea. to quote a good friend of mine "it looked easy on youtube!". anyways, i got this garbage from sally's. it was petro based and slimy, nasty, smelled ... ok, yeah it kinda smelled too. anyways, after a few uses and more internet research, found that if i choose to use wax, i shouldnt use something with petro cuz it could cause slippage. i stumbled onto soaring eagles website. in my opnion, i have never seen a more negative website. in reading what there was, i found so much complaining, name calling, childish behavior that i stepped away. it was terrible. i landed on and it was positive and friendly. i ordered the kit and began the journey for real. i used dhhq wax for a month and then switched to the a/b routine. in under 4 months, i was locked and things were amazing! i met some people that i though would change my life...encouraged them on their journey and now they are backstabbing. have i gone out of my way to publically tell what i know? nope. cuz that isnt the right thing to do on any level...but power to those that think bashing people is honestly a good way to go about things. i have turned the other cheek and figure if they want to make themselves look like the people they really are...well, thats on them. what amazes me is that they still claim they will use dhhq product...but why should they if their day is centered around bashing it?

anyways, i think my point to this blog it to tell people that the dhhq wax DOES work. i read on a forum its like toothpaste. in small doses its ok, in large doses its not. moderation is the key to everything except chocolate. chocolate must be consumed in mass quantities! anyways, if you misuse something, its not the companies fault when they even tell you to not misuse the stuff!

i am continuing on my dreadlock journey with my head held high and love helping others get the dreadlocks they wanted or maintenance cuz they got lazy. this journey has taught me so much about me and about other people. i must admit...being called a liar, troll and psycho cuz i believe what i believe...well, even God said that people will get made fun of if they believe him. im not saying jonny is a god (sorry man!)...but i am saying that his stuff has worked for me.

his most recent pic makes me im enclosing it for your viewing pleasure.

peace love and locks (i like how ive been using this tag line for awhile and someone took it to make a group. glad to know my ideas are just that good!).



so ive decided i need to blog about whats on my mind. ive been given the most incredible chance to open a salon that is a dreadlock only salon and be one of the first to be certified by DHHQ as a dreadlock specialist. i mean, dreadlocks changed my life...i cannot even explain it..and when i do some get it, some laugh and others just think im crazy. well, crazy may be close but nevertheless....

i have made some very amazing friends along this journey. many thanks to facebook for this! the dhhq page is one i frequent often and LOVE helping people out with their dreadlock journey. even traveling to help people get work done has been a highlight. this journey is only third to the one i have with god and with my son.

i have learned that there are 2 types of people in EVERY stereotype. the first kind of person thinks with their heart and with what feels right. i dont always do lots of book research, i dont sit through countless lectures. i go with what is thrown my way and i decide how i feel about it. then there are those that study EVERYTHING to the n'th degree. i dont mind those kind of people, i just tend to not get along with them as well. i would prefer to learn from life than a textbook.

so in contact with the right people, this salon will be happening...just not as i was thinking. i will be doing it from here for now..then as soon as i am able, i will be relocating it. i will have a place for fellow DHHQ users to sell their things, local place for people to buy DHHQ stuff, my salted earth should be pretty awesome. i mean come on, a life where you are helping people do something that means something to them. that is just amazing!

i am feeling raw over a set of circumstances that have transpired over the last few days...sitting here just gnawing on the fat and trying to figure out what i will do with what has happened. sigh. life isnt supposed to be so complicated...or is it?

im off to go hear the wonderful music of in syracuse. hes just amazing. and it will help me get myself centered before i head to philly with renee for the weekend. ooh, and im meeting marla! woohoo!

peace, love and locks

hospital update

hey all

so yeah, i blew out my L5S1 for the third time. i knew i was in trouble cuz of some of the side effects. dawn took me into crouse hospital where a crazy week ensued.

so for starters, i have so many family members with diabetes that i am at HIGH risk. my dr decided to have me start glumetza so i can AVOID becoming diabetic. also, please keep in mind, my blood pressure is picture perfect :) when a body is in pain, the blood pressure goes up. makes sense right? haha, wait until you hear this.

ok, so im at one of the BEST hospitals in syracuse. the nurse came in and said "hey, it's time for your finger stick." now, i am under the influence of their best pain meds (diulated) and knew i was mentally numb..but i also knew i didnt do finger sticks ever. so i told them no. you would think i killed the nurses dog. then, another nurse came in and said it was time for my insulin. i have NEVER taken insulin EVER in my life and want to keep it that way. so after arguing with them for almost an hour, they left me alone. this persisted for 3 days. i finally had enough and requested to speak to the dr that ordered these things. after an HOUR of talking with the dr, i got him to cancel the insulin AND finger stick. i had to give him ONE stick and if it was ok, he would cancel it. well, guess what? i hit it right on the nose :)

a day of "peace" goes by and they start asking me if i would like to take my blood pressure medicine. i can only imagine the look on my face. i have NEVER in my life ever taken blood pressure medicine. it is always 120/80 pretty much like clockwork. after 4 days of refusing it, i again ask for the dr that prescribed this. in walks this little woman with a indian name. i wish i could remember. i was being discharged and she showed up. she says she will give me some motrin to deal with the blown disc (yeah, cuz THAT is gonna help). she says she doesn't want to send me home with anything stronger cuz of my blood pressure issues. i started to laugh. i told her i have NEVER had bp issues not have i EVER had bp meds. my family dr is pretty amazing and she would have had me start them if she thought i needed them. i explain to the dr that i refused the meds everytime...she says she even lowered the dose....i couldnt help but laugh cuz she had NO IDEA i NEVER took the meds she prescribed. she says she will call my family dr to clarify things. i tell her i will save her a step and called my dr. in 4 min i had my family np informed to what is going on and she asks to speak to this dr at crouse. the dr was no where to be found. 15 min later, she is in the o.r.. so in walks peter sinatra. he is a pa i guess...i cannot really remember. i just remember i liked his bedside manner and his name made me think of my dad's love of FRANK SINATRA. he tells me he has cleared up the mess and apologized.

the nursing staff was only 25% with it. the night staff was so loud that you couldnt even get sleep with the door closed. my best sleep was 6am-10am cuz the shifts were changing and the morning shift wasnt really awake yet!

i DO have to thank ALL Of you that came to visit, sent cards, emailed, called, text messages. SUPER COOL kudos to Jonny and Sloan for using their status message to canvas for prayers. that was super cool. and hey, little brah, johnneh, i'm assuming you told them so kudos for lookin out for me!

the weirdest thing at crouse was my 2nd night there. i woke up with my hair being played with. i though i was dreaming. i woke up and looked and there was a nurse checking out my dreadlocks. apparently the fact that i was white and knotty spread through the floor like wildfire. haha. she said she had to see for herself cuz another nurse said they were really awesome. she and i talked dreadlocks for about an hour. her bf has them (twisties) and we discussed the pros and cons of ethnic vs white hair. i gave her (yes, cuz i keep em on me) my dreadheadhq card so that her bf could try the shampoo :) yes, even in sincere pain, i gave dhhq props. lol.

many many many thanks to michelle for getting noah to camp aldersgate and for bringing him in for daily was a NICE change from the norm. i asked noah how it was hanging out with michelle and dawn with me in the hospital. he announced it was SO awesome cuz he got to see me every day. that was awesome. it helped me more than i could ever thanks michelle and dawn.

surgery will be in about a month after the complication is taken care of. then im looking at 2 months of recovery. for now, im walking with a foot brace...but could be worse!

well, i gotta go get michelle's boys and then catch up on emails and maybe figure out how to make a dhhq we'll see what happens.

peace, love and locks!

Noah, Scotty and Aidan goofing around
Amy and Phoenix workin on my locks


wow, i had the best weekend! i got to meet up with Amy, Meg and Melanie! it was so much fun. we met up at northwest park in hartford and enjoyed the beauty. we all brought food to share and the kids got to explore this awesome park. amy didnt waste anytime diving into my dreadlocks. i didnt think she would go ALL THE WAY through ALL my dreadlocks...but i must confess, her work is outstanding! between amy and jenn my locks look amazing! i still want to go meet up with the knotted empresses at sometime.

i am looking forward to meeting up with other dreadlocked folks.

i traded some of my dreadwraps and salts with meg for a skirt she's making me...and its STUNNING! i also gave amy salts for the goodie bags she is using :)

the fellowship was so easy. you would think meeting up with "strangers" would be awkward but it just flowed like we saw eachother the weekend prior!

i'll post pics individually as posts as this uploader is making me crazy.

i'm looking forward to meeting more dhhq dreadheads and have sent a proposal to jonny and's to hopin!

peace love and locks,

Hello :)

I was asked to go to Youngstown, Ohio area to help Beth's dream of being knotty come true :) What a sincere honor and joy it was!

Beth is an herbalist and has 3 kids. She is married to Jim who does some awesome work with silver. I was honored to be asked to help her out.

When I got there, the smells of her little shop overwhelmed me and SMELLED SO GOOD!!! Beth gave me a huge hug, checked out my dreadlocks and we sat down to chat.

Her hair was mid-lower back. I should have measured how long it was. I was so worried it would take a lot of time but it actually only took about 18 hours. We did 3/4 inch sections through most of her hair...some are only 1/2 inch sections. We used the accelerator and then I did 7 dreadies the first night.

Tuesday, Beth's daughters (Leah, Becca and Jen) came over to help dreadlock. Her girls are amazing. I kinda got adopted into the family. We all got so silly and laughed SO hard. My stomach really hurt! Her hair was a great texture as the dreadlocks went in fairly easily. Her daughters really seemed to love giving "mom" the locks she wanted. When we finished the day, there were only 7 more to go...woohoo!

Wednesday, Beth and I took an hour long road trip to meet up with Jennifer Rose! Jenn worked on my hair as I was waxing Beth's hair. It was awesome. I wish we had more time but I KNOW we will all meet again.

We got back to Beth's house and had a pizza party with her daughter and two of her grandkids. It was just so much fun.

I really, REALLY enjoyed my time with them all! I look forward to Beth's locks maturing and helping her out as much as I can.

Fellow dreadheadhq users...please welcome BETH!!!

peace love and locks,

so in reflecting on the fact that ive had dreadlocks for almost 6 months, figured i would do a few product reviews for ya!

Dreadheadhq Shampoo...
This stuff is simply amazing. i love how clear it is when it comes out of the can see the difference right off the bat! i use a nickle size portion every monday and thursday when i wash. my locks feel amazing after. i like how they dry so fast...then again, my hair is only to my shoulders. i let my son try it (he has regular hair)...and woah, his hair was SOOOO SMOOTH and felt and looked amazing! i recommend this shampoo to EVERYONE!

Dreadheadhq Wax...
ok, disclaimer. if you DON'T like wax, relax. this is MY review. please do not post negative comments on this!

so this wax smells amazing. i LOVE the hemp seed oil...its just awesome. i used the suggested amounts from dreadheadhq and used it for 1 month full time and 1 month part time. it has helped my locks keep form, i have NO residue or dirty spots as people claim you can have with wax. i have been without wax for 4 months now...and my hair is clean, healthy and scent-sational!

Dreadheadhq Butta...
do i really need to say anymore? the smell is insane! i was at shakori hills grassroots festival and people i was around said my locks smelled good enough to eat! i LOVE how soft and frizz-free my locks are. i dont use it daily...only every other week. this is probably one of my fav products!

HONCHO = LOVE! i didnt think i would miss a brush on my scalp cuz my daughter had been doing my perms for a few years...but oh man, i sure did. so i sucked it up and got this. oh was i just really not prepared for this! it feels so good! ya know, when a dog scratches up against something and has that look of "oh yeah"? yeah, thats kinda of how it feels...just wonderful. its like the honcho is kissing my scalp so my hair grows faster! if i could marry an inanimate object...this would be it.

Hope this helps you decide what to use! there are other products that i use that i will do reviews for another day! (blogspot has been crashing and its making me scared that i will have to do this for a 3rd time!)

peace, love and locks!

i am in the process of saving $ so i can move down south and buy some land to start SALTED EARTH HOMESTEAD. for several years, i have been desiring a place where i can hold concerts often, have fresh eggs, have a nice garden to supply veggies, maybe some fruit trees, log cabin, solar panels or wind get back down to basics i guess. rick reese said he would be more than willing to build the log now i need to just save save save.

in trying to think outside the box for extra income to make my dream a reality, it occured to me i should prob offer my bathsalts. knowing that my dreadlocks matured faster than 6 months, i figured out it had to be my salts. the bathsalts have helped my skin in ways that i cannot begin to explain.

so knowing i would be seeing jonny and sloan, i decided to bring them some to try. as a way of saying thankyou and hoping they would feel the positive effects that i felt. well not only did they love them, they agreed they would help dreadlocks!


i posted on the dhhq site and found a few people that were willing to try them out. what excited me more is i shipped one to denmark and the other to uk! that was amazing!

and the response from people using them have been INCREDIBLE! i started the etsy store thanks to the help of a wonderful Amy (again! not sure what i would do without her help!) and waiting my first sale. several people have emailed asking just waiting.

i talked to gary weeks sunday and mentioned to him that in september, i wanted to do a push to raise $ for and he said ok. so in september, there will be tourquise lids and saltcloths. $1 from each purchase will go to help fund ovarian cancer research and help carry on Heather Week's legacy. will be nice to help out.

i want to do something for cervical cancer awareness i'm looking into that.

so i guess salted earth homestead was created a little earlier than i planned...but it's all good! i am hoping others can enjoy the effects of the salts and share them with everyone. i will eventually be putting out there different uses for the salts aside from skin and dreadlock care.

if you havent had the chance to try them, my etsy store is linked to my facebook, or you can add saltedearth homestead to your friends list via fb (pick the one that has the pic...the other one i couldnt get into after it was created..)

well, i just did a nice soak at michelle's house so i better go do some palm rolling and cwr!

peace, love and locks,

Rock the Routine

2 blogs in a week :) woohoo!

tomorrow, my church family is Rocking the Routine! instead of our regular service, we are all meeting at 9am and having a worship service TOGETHER! (i have been a member for 5 years. there are people i still haven't met because i attend the 1045 service....not the 9am one!) it will be nice to meet new people, see who sits where i normally sit and to have the church so packed it spills out into fellowship hall! then we are all going out on projects around our church and into the community. i am helping with the HOPE FOR HEATHER ribbons ( that will be passed out at the fair and other functions. i am feeling really good about helping because heather is my friend gary's daughter. she passed away too early due to cancer. she and i were both sick at the same time. i feel so blessed i am still alive and living a wonderful life. i sometimes feel guilty that she is gone...she was so young, full of talent and life. it was hard seeing my friend's family grieve in such a hard way.

there are about 20 other things people can do for rock the routine. some are going to vera house to do some interior painting, helping sort clothing for the refugee clothing drive, going to the rescue mission and helping out, cleaning up a park, helping a single mom with limited income with some work around the house....

seriously, how amazing is that?!

after we do our "jobs", we are all meeting back at the church for a coverdish dinner and then a worship celebration together. unfortunatly, noah has a birthday party to attend so i will miss out on that.


at 7pm, we are going to believer's chapel (i think...gotta check the tickets) to worship with PAUL BALOCHE!!! come on! i am so excited. for those of you that do not know him, he is well worth the lookup. he is one of the top worship leaders in the country...i beg to say in the WORLD...but that might be a little outlandish...might be right on...not sure. when he and ROBIN MARK get together...oh man, its INSANE!

i am fairly excited (ok, fairly is an UNDERSTATEMENT) for tomorrow. going to sleep tonight might be a little difficut.

at SOME point, between pneumonia and rock the routine, i GOTTA find time to work on my dreadlocks...they need some serious attention. been kinda lax since vacation.

well, i gotta go get some things done. just dont want to overdo it too much today.

peace, love and locks,

Spring Break


i need to apologize for the lack of blogging. where i am living, there is only dialup and its SLOOOOOOOOOOW. (yes, i live that far into the country) thank you michelle for the use of your laptop and internet!

ok so, i promised i would blog about spring break and meeting jonny and here goes!

april 16th, we left ny and got into philly to watch roy "doc" halliday pitch an almost shut out game (until madson got in that is) on opening weekend and his home opener. we had the dhhq sign and made phanvision (the internal closed circuit tv). jonny and sloan were watching to see if they saw us but they didnt.

after the game, we headed down to sc to spend time with my family. we had a great cookout and spent a nice afternoon together. after the cookout, noah and i went to greystone park for a photo shoot with my friends pam and randy. it was a lot of fun. noah got to play in the river with josiah and hudson. it was a blast!

monday the 19th, we went and met up with jonny and sloan!!!!! they met me at the door of piggy park and was greeted with hugs. (yes john, i gave jonny a bear hug for you!) we shared a meal together and talked about some ideas for dhhq and to get to know eachother better. it was a nice time...i wish we could have had more time but i had to get on the road to avoid traffic.

we got into temple a few hours early (i HAD to avoid atlanta rush hour) and suprised the burns family. we got there, knocked and walked into their home. tj came down the stairs and was shocked we were there...i grabbed the little stinker and hugged him and started tearing up. skylar was next, then kaitlyn...then connor. it was nuts. they grew up so much in 3 years. bob and i pulled a prank on christen and spent the night with them. it was so awesome catching up with them. noah had a SINCERE BLAST catching up with his old friends. it was nice watching them was like no time passed at all.

on 4/20, rick reese made the trip into temple to spend the evening with me! it was so amazing seeing him. we went in and got his name tattooed on the tattoo in memory of chris hobler. it was awesome. i hadnt seen him since july 1999. psycho tattoo did a great job.

on 4/21 we drove back into columbia to meet up with jonny and sloan one more time (a whole 15 min) then met up with mom and my old friend michael for lunch. we fought traffic in columbia and made it to nc.

shakori hills.

i dont know even where to begin. we got in LATE wednesday night and set up tent and walked around our other "home". thursday was all hurry. it was nice. festival goers started showing up, you could hear sound systems from the various stages starting there "check 1 2" and rusted root arrived. i got the message to meet preach backstage at grove stage and we walked around. it was nice spending time with him. walked with patrick on accident for a few minutes. their concert was awesome. this was the first time preach saw my dreadlocks. he said they were pretty amazing. dirk loved them too! larry (road manager) asked if i could loan him a few...he is rather crazy...but i like him. they, unfortunatly, left right after the show and preach promised to see me soon. patrick and dirk gave lots of hugs and said next time we should be able to get more time together. the cool part about their show was michael's brother came on stage for "send me on my way". was cool to meet him. they seem rather close. the rest of the weekend was a huge blur! it went so fast. the weather was incredible, i got to hang out with curtis (a shakori friend) and met so many new people. i got to reconnect with the burgess family and it was great catching up and spending time together.

leaving shakori was sad. i saw so many concerts...bela fleck was incredible...bassekou rocked, holy ghost tent revival tore the roof was just amazing.

now that i am home, i got the ok from jonny and sloan to plan a camping weekend with dhhq so we can all meet those that have helped our dreadlock journey. i am going to be getting ahold of shakori hills to see about a group rate. it's central nc, would be cheaper than going elsewhere and there are lots of amazing bands. might be a cheaper option for folks. so im going to be looking into it this month.

thanks to everyone for your hospitality and love! it was an amazing time!

peace, love and locks,

regular meds?

hey folks!

well, since ive been questioned by a few people about medicines...and i firmly believe conventional medicines arent the greatest...

here is what i do to help with my constant state of pain...

for starters, i do take estrogen due to the hystrectomy. im not really a fan of it...but it works. the hot flashes were just so bad.

secondly, i drink emergen-c. it is PACKED with vitamin c which helps me not get sick and helps me feel better. believe this is or not, i prefer the pink lemonaid flavor so far! (that was given to me by a friend who didnt like them.) the raspberry is my second favorite.

now, to help with my migraines and pain, i DO use thieve's oil. its pretty amazing. it has also helped keep away colds! a few drops on my feet massaged in and poof! when i DO get a cold, i use RSV. it's amazing :) it's a combination of every euclyputus plant oil crushed and smells awesome. i actually stumbled on it when i had H1N1 columbus day weekend!

i have been lucky to use the pt that i was taught and breathing techniques i learned. the diet i use has helped also. now if the weight would start coming off i would be happier :) that will come off eventually!

the other thing that i have been asked is how am i healing...well good news in that area! i am discharged from the nurse as of friday!! i mean, all they have been doing is dressing changes (wet to dry) and vitals. they were monitoring my pain and claimed i should take the pain meds as prescribed...but if i can make it without taking them...well, then everyone wins! i save my insurance company money, i save me money and i dont have to infect my body with man made chemicals! its a win - win imo!

i feel that i am setting a great example to my son be seeking alternative medicines that are godly made...not man made. yes, the estrogen and emergen-c ARE manmade...but nothing else is.

ok, hope this helps those curious minds!

im heading to bed. i didnt sleep well last night and i have SO MUCH to do tomorrow :)

peace, love and dreads

ps...if you believe in the power of prayer, my son and i could use all the prayer you can give! when i am at liberty to discuss more, i gladly will!

oh yeah, so i was really encouraged the other day when i stumbled across amy. she is a dreadhead momma and pretty down to earth. she and i became fb friends and she says she now has a blog and asked me to read it. we have more in common than i realized! i was pretty shocked to read that i was the encouragement for her to start blogging! how awesome :) well, she is totally MORE computer literate than i am. i thought i was ok...but she has helped me get this blog where i wanted it! i noticed she had a really cute layout. she mentioned this site and that she saw one that made her think of me. voila, its the one i liked the best! so here ya go....! tada! my new look :) its awesome!

it caused me to sit back and think...

i mean, ive only had locks for just over 4 months now. but the WHOLE DHHQ ( community has been INSANELY LOVING! always there with encouragement, words of advice if meh locks are needing words of advice, a laugh if i am having a hard day...shoot, jennifer is sending me a .7mm crochet hook cuz she got several from ebay and didnt need that many and i am sending her (jen - they went out in the mail today!) bath salts that i make...these are people i have NEVER MET! but know that if i am in the area, meeting them would be totally a possibility! i mean, amazing.

ok, well, castle is on tv and ive had such a busy few days! i have LOTS to do before i take off for vacation :)

peace, love and dreads,


according to, the defination of grace is as follows:

grace   [greys] Show IPA noun, verb,graced, grac·ing.
elegance or beauty of form, manner, motion, or action.
a pleasing or attractive quality or endowment.
favor or good will.
a manifestation of favor, esp. by a superior: It was only through the dean's grace that I wasn't expelled from school.
mercy; clemency; pardon: an act of grace.
favor shown in granting a delay or temporary immunity.
an allowance of time after a debt or bill has become payable granted to the debtor before suit can be brought against him or her or a penalty applied: The life insurance premium is due today, but we have 31 days' grace before the policy lapses. Compare grace period.
the freely given, unmerited favor and love of God.
the influence or spirit of God operating in humans to regenerate or strengthen them.
a virtue or excellence of divine origin: the Christian graces.
Also called state of grace. the condition of being in God's favor or one of the elect.
moral strength: the grace to perform a duty.
a short prayer before or after a meal, in which a blessing is asked and thanks are given.
(usually initial capital letter) a formal title used in addressing or mentioning a duke, duchess, or archbishop, and formerly also a sovereign (usually prec. by your, his, etc.).
Graces, Classical Mythology. the goddesses of beauty, daughters of Zeus and Eurynome, worshiped in Greece as the Charities and in Rome as the Gratiae.
Music. grace note.

i always go out of my way to help others. i am often referred to as an "idealist". i see potential in people and it hurts me when i dont see them reaching for it or doing things that negate what they stand for. i am often guilty of not reaching for my potential. of that i am completely sure. it occurs, more often than not, that i do so much for others that i neglect myself. not that i decide openly that i do not want to take care of myself, it just happens sometimes. i have a friend that i have been friends with for a very long time. this friend i will name joe as this isn't his real name...i don't want people knowing who he is. i am sharing this because the lesson i learned is too good NOT to share. so here goes.

joe has amazing talent. joe is NOT a go-getter and has an addictive personality. not that when you meet joe you are attracted like a magnet, more like things of addictive nature are difficult for him to say no to. alcohol, weed...etc. once joe gets going, he has a hard time stopping...if it is offered, he jumps at the chance to to participate and then, again, cannot stop. i have done everything i can to discourage joe's participation in this. to my knowledge, it has haulted almost completely. joe's self destructive path has cost him his children, his family home, his car and even his freedom. the irony, i have busted my bottom to help him correct these things only for him to screw them up again within a month. i had to set up boundaries and put some serious distance.


yesterday, while spending time with joe, someone came and brought me a gift. this gift came from a COMPLETE stranger. and it was full of things that i TOTALLY use on a daily and made with all vegetable products/essential oils. perfectly amazing. this person told me she felt she needed to. talk about blow me away.


today, while trying to pick up the last of the pieces so i can put as much distance and boundaries as possible in place so i can move on...i met this croatian woman. she is going to help me get things straightened around and then we are both backing away. joe states that he needs to get his life in order financially but cannot get a regular job. i state that its not that he cannot get a job, that he refuses to and refuses to do anything to make his situation better. joe leaves the house and sits outside and does what he always does when he doesnt want to deal with any reality. he pretends he is asleep. it gets me so mad that i can barely breathe. i have gone to such insane lengths to help joe out and it feels like a slap in the face that he REFUSES to do what he has to do.


this croatian woman is very intelligent and explains to me why joe will never change and why she has stepped away and why he is self destructive. she proceeds to tell me that she will gladly hold me accountable as i step away to where i feel comfortable. it reduces me to tears. i have NEVER met this woman before and yet, there she is pulling my heart strings to the point of tears. it made me realize that no matter what i would like for anyone, if THEY don't want to change, they arent going to. i am feeling such resolve from lots of prayer and talking to people and letting god's grace pour through me. i will gladly help people out however, it will be very different. and you all have joe to thank (as well as emily) for walking all over me.



hey :) i moved around my pics a bit...

added the sponsorship logo :) and figured i would put a pic here for all to see my FULLY LOCKED dreadlocks with MANY props to the dhhq family :) this pic was taken today which makes my dreads 4 months 1 day old :)

peace, love and dreads



i mean to render me speachless is pretty hard.

but today...


i knew already today would be hard. but this hard? yeah, wasnt expecting it. then the date dawned on me and i had the most amazing realization! i have something to look forward on this date now! it's the 4 month anniversary of my locks. i posted a pic 2 days ago and jonny commented saying something to the fact that they have locked! woohoo :)

so i guess today has turned out better than i figured.

now to try and recop all the sleep i lost!

i am getting more and more excited to go meet jonny and sloan. hope its mutual! i do gotta get workin on my sign for the phillies game. i kinda hope it gets picked up! how cool it would be!

peace, love and dreads,

Hey :)

So, this is an email I sent to Jonny...was too good to NOT post publically!

so i've been thinking and reflecting of the changes my year has had. i do this every birthday. then i got to my hair and my healing and how i truly feel they are connected. well, then my thinking went kinda south...i was thinking about the little things that changed with dreads that i had NO IDEA about.

1. the insanely long time it takes to dry hair...
2. had to get new winter hat
3. had to get a new windbreaker due to velcro
4. absorbing smoke or other crappy smells and how to get rid of them or protect against them *
5. when they get longer, they are gonna be HEAVY and i have metal in my much can my neck take (this one scared me most of all.)
6. hair gets stuck in weird places...inside of my iguana cage when i am cleaning it out, in the door jam of the car when ive waxed, on a lose nail that i didnt know was there (yeah, that hurt!)...etc
7. how to control the urge to palmroll or cwr in the MOVIE THEATER or while driving
8. how many hours of serious work these are gonna take
9. getting dreads caught in a necklace clasp
10. preparing to meet some of the CRAZIEST people that you love and dont know what you would do without]]

it's been kinda funny thinking of these about them ops pts? lol. so yeah, think it could be VERY comical and show a different side to the thinking process. i will SO totally help...and wish i had editing software. i miss making stupid little movies for college!

so there you have it! lol. let me explain the *.

in ny, there is a law (its several years old) that states you cannot smoke in public bldgs, including bars. no biggie. i LOVE going to hear bands and not smelling like an ashtray the next day! it encourages me to go out more to be honest! well, if places wanted to KEEP smoking, they had to get a seperate vent system and enterence / exit. so in feb, my friend mary and i went to adams, ny to this little hick bar to hear THE TOWNIES and FREE GRASS UNION (look em up...they are pretty amazing!). not only was i shocked that the bar HAS a smoke room, the bands played INSIDE IT! oy. mary and i went in while FREE GRASS UNION was playing. just some seriously awesome bluegrass! was nice meeting the people and the band. the bands changed up and i stepped outside to get some MUCH needed air...the TOWNIES took the stage and ripped their jams up! it was awesome. the smoke, however, wasnt. so while THE TOWNIES were playin, Happy Cassie came over and we were chatting. She commented on my dreads and that she used dreadheadhq stuff too! it then dawned on me, OH NO! I HAVE DREADS AND THEY ARE GONNA BE SO FULL OF SMOKE DAYSSSSS! talk about mini crisis! i sing at church and didnt want to smell like THAT in church! uggh. luckily, happy cassie knew what to do!

it just makes me giggle. i mean, i have dreads. it's just hair, right? well, so many things need to be thought about before you get them...and until you actually live with them, you dont know or cannot think of all the angles. am i angry or upset? ABSOLUTELY NOT! i love them. (wish the backs were easier to work on...but alas, such as life!) just thought i would post this to help people out.

peace, love and dreads,

hey all,

ok, so time for the weekly blog. this week has been a little crazy and unfortunately has ended on a sour note for me personally. i am feeling quite frustrated as things i do tend not to flop. but then again, you can only succeed as far as your support will carry you. guess i didnt have much support....which is quite a shocker for me.

i am shocked at how many people are shocked when i have a bad day! i didnt realize that i was so upbeat that when i have a bad day, people kind of freak out. its kind of funny...but still stinks at the same time.

relax people, betsy can have a bad day too!

i am very much looking forward to my venture down south. some good time in philly, with family and with some free-wheeling hippies is just what i need. probably more than i should admit. and i am of course looking forward to meeting jonny and sloan ... well, not sure sloan is coming out ... but i know jonny is! i am also looking so forward to seeing rick. i havent seen him since i was preg for noah. although we talk often and text even more often ... a part of my heart is sad cuz i havent seen him in 10 years. that DOES mean my tattoo will be nearly finished in seeing him. he still has to sign my arm. im not looking forward to all the driving...but cannot wait for 10 days of oh yeah :)

anyways, my dreads are almost 4 months old. minus the roots and the very backs, im so beyond thrilled with them! i am still amazed at the looks i get from people. it makes me giggle hearing the comments.

last night at the lost horizon, a guy came in with some insane dreads. i dont know this guy and i didnt have a chance to talk to him. i sat at the bar, drinking my water, and heather (bartender...she's pretty amazing!) came over and asked whats up. i told her i was feeling kind of self conscious because that guys dreads were awesome. i told her i LOVE mine but feel a little insecure around others with them. she said to not feel self conscious because mine are awesome. ahhh, i wasn't looking for a compliment but i could tell she genuinely meant it. that made me feel better though.

i dont really struggle with self image weight, well, thank the wheelchair, stress and the inability to exercize the way i am used to...but i will reconquer it all as soon as i am fully healed. i do go walking and bought a yoga video for when i am released medically. to be honest, i am itching to work out.

well, anyways, if you love good music, the band that played for me last night was great. they are called iS and they recently opened for keller williams. thanks to the first band for NOT showing up until it was almost over (and it was the band i was the most excited to see out of every band ive booked! sigh) and the sweet 16, the crowd was way too small. and the owner of the club pulled the plug. said i could do shows every 6 weeks...and that is great...but i had to just cancel 4 shows. not cool in my book. but i understand he takes a loss. maybe starting a concert series the week before march madness wasnt brilliant. i am currently trying to save the april 8th show with pia mater and sophistifunk. and rally and people able to come out...well, that would be indeed fantastic!

so im off to go get bongo on his leash and hit the pavement. its a much needed walk.

peace love and dreads,

so much on one day!

so yesterday was the 16th. that marks the 3rd month of me being legitimately CANCER FREE! woohoo! i am trying to not get all carried away. i dont want to psych myself out. yesterday also starts the one month countdown to my trip down south! it's going to be great getting back to shakori hills grassroots fest. there are a few places that fell like home...this is one of them. the love and music that pours out...ah, it does my heart good! i am making a few pitstops on the way to shakori. im bringing noah to his FIRST EVER phillies game at citizen's bank park. oh yeah :) then we are going to have dinner at his paternal grandparents house one night. im meeting up with jonny from dreadheadhq to meet, chat and eat maurice's gourmet bbq (mmmm hash and rice!) and spend time with mom and dad! then taking a 2 day stop in atlanta to spend time with christen, bob and the kids...and a day with rick reese. then off to shakori.

while i am at shakori hills, i will get to spend time with my old friends rusted root. i miss preach, dirk, patrick quite a bit! will be nice to see them. i will also get the chance to spend time with bela fleck. wootwoot! there are other bands that are going to be there that i am excited to see again...donna the buffalo (as always!). note to self...try to get a date from jed for lost jams...i was wanting to set up a dreadheadhq booth but the people putting it on didnt think it was as good of an idea as i did. im hoping jonny can get me tons of those little cards cuz there are about 18,000 people that i will come into contact with!

yesterday ALSO is the day my friend earle came to visit. he pops in and out on a whim. anyways, he has had dreads 11 years. must be nice to be able to have twisties turn into such gorgeous locks! kinda wish i was black for that reason. well, he had this one lock hanging by a hair...literally. it had 1 smaller dreads coming off the piece that was hanging on for dear luck. so we dreaded it into one of my locks. it looks cool and silly all at the same time!

now my back looks terrible in this pic! uggh. i am in serious need of help on my back...earle said he would make some time to come help but he doesnt have a clue what to do. guess some good clockwise rubbing and palm rolling are needed...hey jonny, wanna lend a hand? (that would be pretty rad!)

tonight, the 17th is st patrick's day. so michelle, her kids, noah and i head to quaker steak and lube to hear boots n'shorts play. totally amazing this band is! i just love them! (check em on myspace if you are curious...well worth the listen!) it was like a private celebration for me in relation to yesterday. i was (again) the only one out with dreads. its kinda cool and im getting used to the stares...but a little insane at the same time.

(michelle and me being silly!)

i feel like this has been one big ramble! i am so sorry if you agree...i have so many things bouncing around in my head. well, guess i should finish talking to john, a fellow dreadhead and then head to bed. i am pretty exhausted. i took my grandma to the dr and then to do errands. then out for dinner and music...and sitting here, all the time outside and kind of overdoing it...yep, im EXHAUSTED. more soon!

peace, love and dreads!

what did i learn?


well, as promised, here is my next blog! i want to disclaim this now. the opinions in this blog are MY views....not necessarily those of let me explain. i am a christian and the dreads have helped me draw closer to god. (also, disclaimer, i dont capitalize anything...not out of disrespect. i think my brain goes faster than my fingers...) so in me stating my christian beliefs, they may not necessarily be what jonny and sloan believe. ok, ready to rock and load?

i guess first off i am a christian. i am not religious. i believe in god, jesus and the holy spirit. i believe that the bible is truth and that when i die, i will go to heaven and hear "well done, you good and faithful servant.". these words haunt me daily as i try to be a "jesus in skin" to everyone i meet. my uncle stated that i suffer from g.p.s. no, not global positioning service, good person syndrome. i believe that because jesus did things for people, i should also. fair enough. i have had to learn that it is ok to say "no". that was probably the hardest thing for me!

what do i do while working on my dreads? well, that one is easy. if i am doing it solo (usually the case), i have itunes cracking out all the christian rock i can listen to! chris tomlin, chris rice, audio adrenaline, jj hellar, acappella, robin mark, paul baloche, keith lancaster, barlow girl, ami shroyer...etc. i spend the time singing, praising god, praying and listening. i tend not to answer the phone, watch tv or play on the computer. that behavior, i save for when i have friends helping.

when i am able to take the time to shut out the world and focus on godly things, i have such a sense of peace and love. sometimes, it is so overwhelming that i cannot help but cry and thank him.

when the dr suggested meds to help with cancer, i refused. i KNEW my god would heal me. i attend the most AMAZING church (christ community umc is baldwinsville, ny) and the prayer warriors there are just...well...beyond words! my pastor (bj) has been very instrumental in prayer and support through my rough few years. he even lovingly renamed me "betsy-JOB" (job...the man in the bible, not what you get dressed for daily.) anyways, its not that im against medicine...i just knew my body has gone through so much i couldnt put it through more.

i believe so much in the power of prayer. i know that prayer is awesome. i love that while working on dreads i can spend the time connecting with the man (or woman) that created me!

if you do not believe, that is your choice. i have been through so much that god is the ONLY explaination possible. do i have all the answers, nope. will i ever, yes...i believe god will reveal things when i get there.

i used to focus on eartly things...having an iphone, laptop, good home, good car, money..etv. can i confess i was MISERABLE! and not just a little...COMPLETELY. since i have shifted my gaze to god, i trust that he will fix things in his time. does what i've been through stink? completely. but i know i am stronger for it and have a better testimony.

anyways, i feel like im chasing bunnies...

during my hour long god sessions, god has revealed that he loves me. over and over again. he loves me. a huge sinner that deserves nothing. but he loves me anyways. he has given me new lyrics to give to gary (my songwritting cohort) to turn into another worship song. (weve already done 2!)

i struggle with being single sometimes. well, i guess considering why i am currently single it has been more difficult. but i know that the only love i need i already have. would i like to find a man to love unconditionally? yeppers! no question there...but am i content in being single until then? yeah i am. there will be hard days but he says in proverbs "guard you heart for it is the wellspring of life". how awesome is that!

not sure what i will blog about next...
see y'all soon!

peace, love, dreads,

here is me before :) many thanks to

here is me now! oh and btw...LETS GO ORANGE!!! BIG EAST CHAMPS AGAIN!!! (taken at the sold out SU vs NOVA game :)

hey all :)

let's start at the beginning :)

i am a single mom and have the best kids in the world. well, technically only 1 kid but my heart accepts 1 more :) Noah is 10 and Leslie is almost 20. so anyways, i love them more than i ever though possible. they both make me laugh, cry, scream...being a mom is awesome!

5/12/07 i was deemed permanently disabled due to breaking my spine (3 times). i have had 3 surgeries (L5-S1 twice and C4567 once...that was the worst one!). ny has this law that if you miss 13 weeks of work for ANY reason, your job has the right to fire you. in august 2007 i got my letter firing me and telling me my insurance was going to end. wow, i was so upset! i loved my job! i had some pretty awesome bosses. i worked with mainly women so i learned really quickly to just ignore the drama they caused on a daily. i was financially stable and things were amazing. at this point, i had just started dating a man a few weeks prior and he stood by my 2nd surgery and helped me heal. i will always be greatful to him for that.

8/07 i had to have minor surgery due to cervical cancer. diagnosis came back that the cancer was clear to the borders and things started to get better for me.

10/07 had surgery C4567 and again, thanks to the man i was dating for being there for me and helping me get back on track. (that is about the last time you will hear me thank him.)

11/07 i attempted to rejoin the workforce. i got a job as a front desk person at a dr office. the office would not supply me the ergonomic items i needed to perform my job duties. i went back to the dr and they said, nope. no more work for you.

2/08 while waiting for my fiance (yep, he asked me to marry me him) to get home from work, i decided to take a bath and have dinner all ready so we could just spend time as a family. his favorite meal in the oven, i hopped in the bath. well, i knew i had been in the tub too long because i looked like a prune and had to replenish the hot water twice. i went to get out of the tub and fell. i fell to the point that my son (who was 8) had to call 911. the downstairs neighbor was the first responder. there i was completely naked and not able to get up. i had no feeling in my left leg. (there was previous nerve damage due to my L5-S1 surgeries...this was way worse.) i spent the week at the hospital and then 4 weeks (i think? i have blocked much of this.) at a NURSING HOME. i was 31 years old and called my 80 year old grandma on her birthday. cool right? WRONG. she was at HOME and i was in the NURSING HOME. irony? yep. and i dont like irony.

mid 3/08 i move into my first handicapped apartment with my son and fiance.

5/09 well, i got sick. still have no insurance because medicaid ended due to my income from SSD. once you are classified as permanently disabled, you have to wait TWO years before you can get medicare. i went to the hospital with abdominal pain and they discharged me. i went to see my ob/gyn and after running tests it was decided i needed a partial hystrectomy due to cancer.

5/8/09 this is my personal 9/11. i called my fiance, told him what was going on. he came home, took my car (my son was with my female parental unit) and went out and got completely drunk. we're talking 3 PITCHERS of yuengling. yep, it was bad. he got in my face and became violent with me. i threw him out.

5/9/09 my daughter leslie came over when i called her. i hesitated calling her as she and her husband of 1 year found out they were expecting (the cutest ever!) kain. she had me call the pastor of our church and i proceeded to go to the hospital. pastor linda met me there as did my cousin. now, let me tell you of my cousin. his name is sean. he worked security for the hospital. he blocked ALL visitors and calls except for people from my church. how amazing. he sat with me while i did my intake / triage and until pastor linda came to be with me for support. what i would do without leslie, sean and pastor linda? i have NO idea.

6/09 my finace has been arrested and spent 24 hours in jail. he now realizes we are over.

mid 6/09 i have a sonogram. cancer spread. no more talk of looking at full hystrectomy. keep in only 32.

6/23/09 i have surgery, its called a sucess and i instantly start menopause. since the house i was living in wasn't condusive to "no stairs", my dear friend, michelle, let me recover in her home. her kids would even argue over who could refill my water. the love i got from michelle and her family makes me tear up just thinking about.

7/09 staples and all, i attend grassroots festival in trumansburg, ny. i overdid it while hanging out with rusted root...well, mainly preach freedom...not really a good idea to have gone. but the music lifted my spirits as always!

8/09 i move into my new home where my ex cannot find me, i am safe and the home is ALREADY handicap access. and i can have a dog! that is the best news.

columbus day weekend, i head to for another grassroots fest. i came down with swine flu WHILE CAMPING! that stunk. well, i came home and just felt awful. my back was killing me. i went to the hospital and they sent me to the surgeon's office. i went in and was stunned to hear they needed to opperate on the baseball sized tumor in my back. yep, it was CANCER! i healed all up and then 12/17/09 went in for yet again ANOTHER surgery. seriously folks, i need a room in my name or something!

now, i've been debating dreads for several years. when i found out the cancer was back...AGAIN...i figured its now or never. i went to my dear friend michelle and she helped me get dreads.

PLEASE NOTE....when i got them put in, it wasnt with dreadheadhq stuff. when the stuff i was using didnt work so well, i did a google search. guess who popped up everywhere? DREADHEADHQ! so i did further research and was so impressed by how laid back and easy they made it look. ok, so its not easy. its massive amounts of work. but SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO worth it!

12/6/09 my dreads were put in! they are just over 3 months old and look amazing. kudos to the DREADHEADHQ's own Jonny and Sloan for all their help, products. also, thanks to dustin and john for emergency help when i though for sure i failed making the dreads!

i am not telling you this story for pity, money or anyother reason other than PLEASE GET YOUR YEARLY CHECKUPS even if you have to self pay. most dr offices will help with payment plans, bill lower rates or even offer free tests. the american cancer society has been a plethura of knowledge and help.

next post...what i learned about myself while dreading.....pretty cool stuff!

peace, love and dreads,

hey everyone!

it's official :) i am now a sponsored member of DREADHEADHQ!

my first blog will be coming soon :)

peace, love and dreads!

About this blog


About Me

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Hey! Welcome to my BLOG! I am a sponsored dreadhead thanks to DREADHEADHQ! I am here to blog about my journey on being a dreadhead, mother, sister, daughter, nonnie and christian. I hope you enjoy the ride!